God Told Me... So Now What?

I have this friend. I remember her on many occasions saying... God told me. Although some might find that far fetched, I believed her whole heartedly, and found myself envying the relationship she had with God. Wow... that God would actually show me or tell me something! As I watched her, and oh I watched her, I saw a woman who lived by faith. A woman who was seeking after Him, and listening for His still and quiet voice. Perhaps that is why she heard it.

Over the past few years my own relationship with God has changed. I have been stretched and I have grown. I find myself seeking Him. And although I still do a lot of the talking, I am learning to hear His voice. And wouldn't you know it... I can say it too... God told me.

God told me. That is my answer. I just know.

This is not the first time He has revealed something like this to me. But there are times, much like now, that I find myself almost wishing He hadn't. There are times when I wonder what I am supposed to do with what He has shown me? Do I share this wisdom? Or am I meant to keep it to myself for now? I doubt it was meant to eat away at my like this, but the fact is, it is.

Confused, I continue to wait for His direction. I continue to pray. I continue to write. I continue to try and trust in Him.

Prov 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path.

A Beautiful Hypocrisy

As I sit here and watch the Opening Ceremonies of the 29th Olympiad, I am moved to tears. How can it be that in a world of war and depravity, we as humankind can come together... 204 nations... forgetting all that is between us.

And while I think that is all wonderful, I cannot help but find the whole thing a bit hypocritical. There are countries here that are at war with each other, and here they all stand in a form of unity created by the game. Here, they all stand together taking part in a dance. A dance with dove like movement... dancers, athletes, guests, and audience. A dove... a symbol of peace. So why is it that it that we can come together for the sake of the game... for the sake of competition... with an unspoken truce. Yet for the sake of humanity? For the sake of lives? We are still a world at war.

Just minutes before watching these opening ceremonies, I read an email from a dear friend living in, and now leaving, the Republic of Georgia. She lives in a city just 40 km from where a Russian peacekeeper was killed by a bomb... where there is fear and death. And yet, these warring countries are standing side by side.

I am not sure if I find this unity and temporary peace beautiful or sickening.

My Own

I wish I was less afraid of sharing more of my own work here.


Hmmm.... maybe some day.

Mercy on the Broken Road

I heard these lyrics, and my heart so resonated with them. How many times have I found myself on a road of brokenness, only to be found, and lifted up by His mercy. My sin and shame dissolved in to His Glory! Praise God! As I sit at His feet, this song is in my heart.

Where the Love Lasts Forever - Hillsong (Sung by Jared Wood)

Your mercy found me
Upon the broken road
And lifted me beyond my failings.
Into Your glory
My sin and shame dissolved
And now forever Yours I 'll stand

In love never to end
To call You more than Lord,
Glorious friend.
So I throw my life upon all that You are,
Cause I know you gave it all for me.
And when all else fades,
My soul will dance with You
Where the love lasts forever.

And forever I will sing,
Lord forever I will sing,
Of how You gave Your life away,
Just to save me,
Lord You saved me.

With You, where the love lasts forever

Grace Like a Blanket

I have fallen short of His glory. My heart knows failure. My shame runs deep. But through it all, I know beyond a doubt that I am covered with His blanket of forgiveness and grace. Thank you Father, for fathering me.

The Father - Heather Clark

It's You I want to know
Come with your presence
Hold me and don't let go
I love the sound of your heart
Like a father protecting me drawing me
That I could know..

The sound of your footsteps coming to me
The look on your face when you"re so proud of me
The sound of you cheering when I succeed
And the touch of your hand
When your fathering me

I have so far to grow
I fall short of your glory
Failure, my heart knows
And my shame runs so deep
But your grace is a blanket
Cover me, that I could know

The sound of your footsteps coming to me
The look on your face when you"re so proud of me
The sound of you cheering when I succeed
And the touch of your hand
When your fathering me

Talkin' 'Bout the Rain

A song I heard again this past weekend resonated with my heart. I could not say it any better.... so here it is. Lord give me the words. I want to stop talkin' 'bout the rain. Take me away from myself.

Here I Go Again - Casting Crowns

Father, hear my prayer
I need the perfect words
Words that he will hear
And know they're straight from You
I don't know what to say
I only know it hurts
To see my only friend slowly fade away

So maybe this time I'll speak the words of life
With Your fire in my eyes
But that old familiar fear is tearin' at my words
What am I so afraid of?
'Cause here I go again
Talkin' 'bout the rain
And mullin' over things that won't live past today
And as I dance around the truth
Time is not his friend
This might be my last chance to tell him that You love Him
But here I go again
Here I go again

Lord, You love him so
You gave Your only Son
If he will just believe
He will never die
But how then will he know
What he has never heard?
Lord he has never seen mirrored in my life

This might be my last chance
To tell him that You love him
This might be my last chance
To tell him that You love him
You love him, You love him

What am I so afraid
What am I so afraid
What am I so afraid of?
How then will he know
What he has never heard?